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Smith in an article for the American Psychological Association, "Are Internet Affairs Different?

" The freedom to fantasize, without the intrusion of reality — as well as the anonymity afforded by the Internet — also can be alluring.

' They might not be able to cross that bridge of forgiveness with you."Forgiveness isn't easy.

"Forgiveness is a choice, it's not mandatory," Rosenberg said.

That same day, I'd been called pointless and ugly and...

"Finding out your spouse has cheated is traumatic, and trauma kind of lingers," Rosenberg said.

Digital devices need to move into public areas of the house, with both partners having full access to the content therein. "One of the worst things you can do is tell everybody in your world about this when you're really raw," Martino said.

Later, when you both "have worked together to get through it, (those) other people in your life might say, 'Are you kidding me?!

Self-compassion is essential right away to get to the next level."Rosenberg added that a breach of trust can trigger other emotional issues if they haven't been resolved.

"If you had abandonment issues or abuse as a child, and you haven't recovered from it, this triggers it — so what you have is a response that is not only bad because someone hurt you, but it (also) has layers of hurt, and you need to look at those unresolved issues."For the cheater: Be accountable for your actions.

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